DailyText

What is the resemblance between a windscreen wiper and a woman? … When they are wet, they do not squeak any more!

If you want a little brother,
kill your dad and fuck your mother.

How does a vagina look before sex? Like a lovely pink rose! And after sex? Ever seen a Bulldog eating Mayonaise?

Sex is like Math, Add the Bed, Subtract the Clothes, Divide the Legs and Multiply!

Do you want to have sex with me? For $50! Please please please….I really need the money!

Sex, drugs & rock n roll, speed weed & birth control, life’s a bitch, then u die, so fuck the world & lets get high!

The first day we met,I wanted you in my bed.Today I’ll know better,so I’ll write it in my letter.In my bed I’ve seen so many faces,so I’ll fuck you at different places

Press down……down more……ok……more……yes……ahh…….yes……almost there……yeah……oh shit……harder……so good! Yeah, that’s textual intercourse!

This program will automatically enlarge your penis. Now starting…beep 6 5 4 3…..beep 2 1….Sorry no penis found!